Silencing the Voice That Says You're a Fraud - Is that Even Possible?

In helping executive transform their organizations we ask them to have the perspective that an organization is a network of conversations. We ask them to have the point of view that their access to their organization, to cause change, is the network of conversations of the organization - change that and the organization changes.

Our coaching then is, "to be a powerful leader, manage the network of conversations". Which means:

• Build on all the conversations in the organization that are consistent with your vision, values, intentions, priorities and commitments. Acknowledge them, tell stories to reinforce them, make heroes out of those who speak them, ...
• Notice all the conversations that are inconsistent with your vision, values, intentions, priorities and commitments. Don't engage with them, as in counter them or argue against them. Instead speak for what you want. Gossip, complaining, undermining, negativity and excuse making all fit in this category. Remember the Cherokee grandfather's advice to his grandson - its all about which conversations are you going to feed?
• With your vision, values, intentions, priorities and commitments as a context keep asking, "what conversations are missing, that if they were in place we would be closer to a one-to-one fit with our intentions?" As you see what's missing put that conversation in place with structures and practices to make sure it stays in place.

Now that said, there is another network of conversations at play with each and every one of us that we need to be aware of and take into account - our internal conversations. Our internal conversations are our ongoing conversations with ourselves about everything, and everyone.

We need to take them into account because these conversations run the show, and much more than most of us are aware of. They are always there commenting about everything. If we start paying attention we will see that we have an internal commentator constantly assessing, evaluating and judging everything and everyone - not least ourselves.

These internal conversations are the filter through which we see the world, see other people, see possibility and opportunity. If part of what we are listening to when we are in a conversation with a colleague, is our critical or negative internal conversation, then the possibility in that relationship is limited.

If the internal conversation we have about ourselves is critical - which it mostly is - we are limiting ourselves. We are limiting our possibilities, our opportunities for successful relationships, our happiness and the possibility of personal peace and contentment.

The challenge in managing the internal conversation is to identify what the conversations are - so listen up. Then the next challenge is feeding the empowering conversations and starving the negative ones by changing the conversation on ourselves when we hear a negative one.

At one time or another just about every successful person I have worked with has shared that they think they are a fraud and are scared stiff about being discovered.

Who created that conversation, "I'm a fraud?". Who gives it head room? And who can change it? - only we can. And it is as easy, or difficult, as choosing which conversation to feed. But just know the default operating state is to feed, or engage with the negativity.

Twitter and Social Media as Leadership Tools - Really?

In their most recent edition of the Welch Way, Jack and Suzy Welch wrote an intriguing piece, Why We Tweet.

Now these are two people (who need no introduction) who are highly intelligent, successful, accomplished, engaged in many things - you get the picture. Not folks who fritter away time, who engage in idle nonsense. I say idle nonsense tongue in cheek, as someone who is not addicted to sports, I could accuse those who are ... Maybe I shouldn't go there.

I am frequently asked about the value of Twitter and social media in general. Is this something C-Suite execs should invest time and energy in?

In responding to questions about the welter of social media and networking sites that are around, and the extent to which we are daily bombarded with a constant stream of techno-distractions, to borrow from a savvy friend, I have a few things to say to execs and a few bits of coaching. For example:

• Notice the extent to which you are in a state of continuous partial attention as another tech savvy friend of mine expresses it. We live in a state of partial fragmentation of attention - we flit from a conversation in progress which we interrupt without even thinking to look at our PDAs, or to switch to a cell phone conversation, or an incoming email, or an alarm reminding us of a meeting, or CNBC constantly on in the corner ready to pull us off. Whatever we are doing it is with partial attention. Which means that Twitter et al can be just one more source of distraction.
• Notice the extent to which all the things you engage with are, or are not, part of a narrative theme - a vision, a mission, a clear purpose, a clear set of organizing principles and values.
• In today's world especially, we cannot live in an unmediate fashion. We have to have some way to distill or filter inputs and we have to be clear what we intend to generate as outputs.

So Twitter is both another tool for effective focused people to extend their range and impact - which is how I coach executives to use it, and every other piece of technology, to reach and move people in furthering their mission, vision and values. And, it has the potential to be just another means for the unfocused to be yet more distracted. It's a choice!